The first comment I get from people when I tell them I am involved with a Teen Mentoring organization is, “That is great – I wish there was something like Girls Plan when I was teen!” The next question I am usually asked is, “Why did I start Girls Plan?” 

Many of you know I am originally from New York (go Brooklyn!) where I was exposed to so many nationalities and cultures. NY is truly a melting pot of people and customs and it is an amazing place to get that type of exposure. However, as diverse as NY is, there are still elements where differences are not accepted and tolerance is not given so freely. My Mom would always tell me I could do anything I put my mind to and my Aunt Aire was one of my biggest cheerleaders. Yet when I left my four walls and went out that door, there were so many attacks from my peers that is was difficult at times to get through the day. Let’s see – being called “Flaca” which is skinny in Spanish or that dreaded “How is the weather up there?” just because I was always the tallest girl in class. Differences…Not…Respected. To put it simply girls with low self-esteem lashing out against other girls to make themselves feel better. I know all of this now but back then – whew! It was exhausting dealing with it!

Fast forward to my work and Ministry life – I still encounter these same “girls” but now they are adults who have the same hurts and the same disappointments from their youth - it just manifests as other things. For example, that woman who is quick to go off and tell you about yourself – this is someone who was probably verbally abused as a child and now will fight back before you can do it to her. Then there is that woman who likes to control everything  and everybody – probably because things were chaotic and out of control in her young life. What about that woman who is always angry? The root cause of anger is hurt. We all know women like this. Difficult to deal with, bitter, impossible to please. Hurting. The problem I have found is these same hurt girls grow into hurt women who in turn pass the hurt to their daughters and the cycle never ends.

What if there was an organization that recognizes hurt girls because its Founder used to be one? What if there was a group of people who were interested in mentoring girls and telling them they are smart and can do anything they want to? What if those same girls start to believe in themselves and grow into adulthood full of confidence? What if these girls can be exposed to a different way of thinking? A thought process the world is not giving them? What if we can also reach the Moms of these girls so they can be delivered from the hurt as well? My God – the possibilities are endless!

So the next time I am asked, “Why did I start Girls Plan?”, I can only smile and respond, “How much time do you have?”

Until next time,

Nishaline